When I Lose Sight Of You Jesus, Bring Me Back To You.
“Do not worry, for the gentiles strive after all these things and your heavenly Father knows that you need them, But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness all these things will be added unto you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, or tomorrow will worry about itself. Today has enough trouble of its own” - Mathew 6:33
Over the last 4 months, I’ve been in a season of fruitfulness comparatively to the last two years in lockdowns. I have to admit and testify that we had a ginormous outpour of the Holy Spirit, in provisions, the faithfulness of answered prayers, and in the presence of the Holy Spirit. There have been other side challenges that have come to hinder the presence of God but in all praise God for his goodness, and faithfulness and all the glory goes back to him.
Things that we prayed for 10 years ago just recently came to pass. How insane is that? A 10-year prayer coming back full circle and we’ve been able to tick off this huge milestone. I felt relieved, grateful, and ecstatic, it was phenomenal and I can only attest that this can only be God’s goodness. If God is willing to give me another 10 years on planet earth with him I would be so grateful.
My second reflection of this week was on wealth and riches. We should never make the gifts bigger than the giver. It can be tempting to love the gifts more than Jesus and I think this comes from human nature, we are prideful. Pride tells us lies such as “we know better than God”, “we are far better at running our lives on our own” and “we can fix that ourselves”. But that’s just the deception of Satan and I pray that these lies will break off your heart as you read this.
It’s easy to be on cruise control and slack off mode when things are good in life. We let things slip a little on our spiritual walk and it weakens our muscles little by little when we don’t practice spiritual growth and consistency. When Jesus asked his disciples to follow him they had to leave everything behind. In the 20th century, Jesus is also calling us to lay everything down at the altar, the good and the bad.
“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me and lead me in the way everlasting.” – Psalm 139:23-24
“Search my heart,” David asked. When I think about searching my own heart at times, I come to realize that I don’t actually carry God's heart. Sometimes, I am carrying my own heart's intentions.
But if I linger a little and search my heart to its real depths, I can find what I have done to the wrong God. God knows us so deeply and intimately. There’s nothing that can be hidden from God. Anytime I find that my heart is far from God I can ask for his mercy and he will graciously give it to me once again.
As we approach Christmas time, I tend to think more about Jesus and about the preparation of my heart to receive him. I don’t know if you have had the chance to as well. If you haven’t, I invite you to think of Jesus during this period.
I think of the things Jesus had to endure for me, and the beauty that I get the chance to gaze upon. In its unraveling, I am aware of my savior and of the secret treasure he has deposited in my heart. Reminding me once again, in my worship that I didn’t choose him but he chooses me first. That I am special but not more special than others, that I am treasured and loved but I cannot act like a spoilt child and that I have to lay it down at the altar again.
This time again when I laid down my life at the altar, Jesus asked if I really meant all of it. “If you are giving me only parts of your life this is not going to work out.”
“I will have nothing to do with that is evil, whoever slanders their neighbors in secret I will put to silence. Whoever has haughty eyes and a proud heart, I will not tolerate. My eyes will be on the faithful of the land, the one whose walk is blameless will minister to me. No one who practices deceit will dwell in my house; no one who speaks falsely will stand in my presence. Every morning, I will put to silence all the wicked in the land, I will cut off every evildoer from the city of the lord.”- Psalm 101:4-8
“In the course of my life, he broke my strength; he cut short my days” – Psalm 102:23
There was a season of life when I had not exercised self-control and I was not right in my heart with God about a couple of things and these were the scriptures the Lord showed me.
Sometimes God allows a certain amount of hurt in our lives for us to repent and come back to him. Please hear me, I am not saying that God gives us bad things but sometimes he does allow challenges in our lives that can bring us close to his heart. For us to seek his peace, presence, and power.
So far on my own personal journey, I’ve come to realize that I can’t do life without him just trying to do it on my own is a very painful process. Why not take the easy path and just ask Jesus to get involved? I don’t know, maybe it’s the pride of my flesh that comes to play, I suppose and I just all have to admit it. I just can’t do life without Jesus!
Questions to ponder upon:
1. Stop and search your heart before God. What’s the condition of your heart?
2. Is there anything that you would like to confess to God that might have hindered your walk with him? It's okay, to be honest with God he is merciful and he wants you to be close to him.
3. Go ahead and repent of the thing that has been a blockage in your relationship with God.
4. Pray that this thing will not hinder your walk with God again and thank God for his sovereignty, accept his forgiveness and walk in the fulness of God.